Yet another song!


grizzlymint
Registered User
Joined: 01/02/07
Posts: 644
grizzlymint
Registered User
Joined: 01/02/07
Posts: 644
03/10/2007 9:54 pm
Hey guys and gals. I had been meaning for quite sometime to write a song about another place of refuge in my life other than music---the river in my town. I fish religiously, mostly in that river. Greatest stress reliever in my life, along side of music.

So this is what I came up with: The River

This is a fairly simple song, but its my favorite that I've recorded yet. Probably due to the topic.

Enjoy. Constructive criticism and comments appreciated.
Let your soul shine. Its better than sunshine. Its better than moonshine. Damn sure better than rain.
# 1
iceandhotwax
Registered User
Joined: 02/21/07
Posts: 126
iceandhotwax
Registered User
Joined: 02/21/07
Posts: 126
03/11/2007 1:34 pm
i really didnt care for the tone of the guitar, but i really like the song , it is very nice to me
# 2
Bar Chord Nick
Full Access
Joined: 04/19/05
Posts: 402
Bar Chord Nick
Full Access
Joined: 04/19/05
Posts: 402
03/11/2007 2:58 pm
I like it. The tone works for me. I think the vocals are much better on this song. Not so heavy on the vocal effects helps I think. Thing I found annoying was the hiss. It was worse in some places than others. Maybe try a noise gate or something to clean that up. I can't really say because I don't know what's causing it.

Overall I think it's a winner.
# 3
grizzlymint
Registered User
Joined: 01/02/07
Posts: 644
grizzlymint
Registered User
Joined: 01/02/07
Posts: 644
03/11/2007 3:57 pm
Nick, may have been a phaser I added somewhere. I'll pull that off and repost, because I believe I heard it to, just didn't hit me as annoying at the time. Thanks for listening and commenting guys. Always appreciated.
Let your soul shine. Its better than sunshine. Its better than moonshine. Damn sure better than rain.
# 4
Bar Chord Nick
Full Access
Joined: 04/19/05
Posts: 402
Bar Chord Nick
Full Access
Joined: 04/19/05
Posts: 402
03/11/2007 7:25 pm
If you didn't hear it then maybe it's soundclicks. I listened to the HIFI. I'll try the MP3 and see if it's still there.
# 5
Bar Chord Nick
Full Access
Joined: 04/19/05
Posts: 402
Bar Chord Nick
Full Access
Joined: 04/19/05
Posts: 402
03/11/2007 7:35 pm
It's on the MP3 too. It's just white noise. I'm listening on head phones. Not noticeable on my speakers. It's worse on the chorus' sections if that help.
# 6
grizzlymint
Registered User
Joined: 01/02/07
Posts: 644
grizzlymint
Registered User
Joined: 01/02/07
Posts: 644
03/11/2007 7:35 pm
I took off the phaser I had in there, but theres still chorus on the guitar. Can't remove that, and I want it there. But yeah, lemme know if you still here it because I took it off and reuploaded it.
Let your soul shine. Its better than sunshine. Its better than moonshine. Damn sure better than rain.
# 7
earthman buck
Registered User
Joined: 10/15/05
Posts: 2,953
earthman buck
Registered User
Joined: 10/15/05
Posts: 2,953
03/12/2007 4:54 am
Pretty good stuff, man. I didn't like this one as much as the other two, but it still held its own.
# 8
grizzlymint
Registered User
Joined: 01/02/07
Posts: 644
grizzlymint
Registered User
Joined: 01/02/07
Posts: 644
03/12/2007 7:20 am
Thanks for listening earthman. I've been criticized a bit on this one. Apparently the lyric structure is "incorrect." I have no writing background, so not really sure what that means. Also been told that the lyrics sound like they should be for a folk song rather than the rock song I made it into. Also been told I'm hard to understand and I sound like a 35 year old man. Whatever that means... Perhaps some revision needs to be done on this one in one form or another.

But thanks for listening guys and commenting. Always appreciated.
Let your soul shine. Its better than sunshine. Its better than moonshine. Damn sure better than rain.
# 9
maestro shaz
Registered User
Joined: 08/20/06
Posts: 245
maestro shaz
Registered User
Joined: 08/20/06
Posts: 245
03/16/2007 3:36 pm
I think this track is good Grizzly.

About the lyrics, that's up to you really. Write what you feel.

But I hardly ever listen to lyrics of songs, cos I can't hear it.
My ears tend to focus more on the music instead.

Back to the track, nice melody, not overly done in the solo. It gives me the feeling of that river your expressing where ever it is in this world ;)

But it seems to have that affect on me.

;) Keep 'em coming Grizzly
[FONT=Verdana]
MuSiC RoCkZz
[/FONT]
My Music
# 10
maestro shaz
Registered User
Joined: 08/20/06
Posts: 245
maestro shaz
Registered User
Joined: 08/20/06
Posts: 245
03/16/2007 3:38 pm
Jeez Grizzly,

You've got over 300 posts now and you've joined GT since Jan 07.

I've been here for a couple of months now and you beat me :mad:
[FONT=Verdana]
MuSiC RoCkZz
[/FONT]
My Music
# 11
Superhuman
Registered User
Joined: 04/18/05
Posts: 1,334
Superhuman
Registered User
Joined: 04/18/05
Posts: 1,334
03/16/2007 9:10 pm
Not the style of music I usually listen too but the playing is good. As far as constructive criticism goes it's mainly on the mix (my biggest problem too). The guitars need to low end and a mid boost as do the drums - they sound a little tinny at the moment. Nothing that can't be fixed. I don't mind the song structure at all, I don't really like following the usual template myself, just do whatever you like. Honest;y, this track could be lifted big time with a bit pf patient mixing. I would ease back a little on the phaser, keep it but reduce the level of wet to dry mix. Post back if you change tweak the mix, I'd love to hear the difference.
# 12
grizzlymint
Registered User
Joined: 01/02/07
Posts: 644
grizzlymint
Registered User
Joined: 01/02/07
Posts: 644
03/16/2007 9:28 pm
Superhuman and Shaz, your comments are much appreciated and respected. Both of you have much more talent than I.

The drums could be fixed probably with some patient composition on Guitar Pro, but that would probably be the best I could do. The RSE always seems to poop out on me. The loop I was using on this track was just a preset on my crappy digitech pedal. I got lazy, so thats what I used... :o

The phaser may call for a total re-recording of that track, because I had it added on my amp...So removing it is not really a possibility. I just got to listen to my stuff on good speakers today for the first time, and it could definitely use some eq'ing. Headphones will do that to you. I try to find a median between my headphones and crappy laptop speakers, but apparently that doesn't apply to good speakers. Bass kind of over powered the rhythms at times....

I'm definitely going to try to rework some things when I find the time, and I'll see if I can find a way to use the advice you gave me, despite my inadequate recording software.

Thanks again for the comments and constructive criticism. Always appreciate it from the caliber of players we have here. Truly the best guitar site I've found. :cool:
Let your soul shine. Its better than sunshine. Its better than moonshine. Damn sure better than rain.
# 13
Superhuman
Registered User
Joined: 04/18/05
Posts: 1,334
Superhuman
Registered User
Joined: 04/18/05
Posts: 1,334
03/16/2007 9:55 pm
Check out this free drum sequencer - it's pretty good for freeware and there are some beats in there that you canuse straight away. http://www.threechords.com/hammerhead/
# 14
grizzlymint
Registered User
Joined: 01/02/07
Posts: 644
grizzlymint
Registered User
Joined: 01/02/07
Posts: 644
03/16/2007 10:15 pm
Sweeeet. That will be very helpful. Thanks man.
Let your soul shine. Its better than sunshine. Its better than moonshine. Damn sure better than rain.
# 15

Please register with a free account to post on the forum.