Originally posted by Incidents Happen
I'm sorry, but I don't understand the negative-style of lyrics that people use today.

Everything seems to be "I"m locked in a cage, i can't get out, i'm going to die, help me out", things like that, what happened to "Look straight ahead, nothin' but blue skies..." ?

The hippies are dead I guess. No offense to hippies. ;) Next guess would be umm, Nirvana. They pretty much made writting depressing lyrics 'cool'. Now if you write about blue skies and fairies your probably gonna be labeled a f@g. Unless there is some cool abstract meaning to it.

About the lyrics there cool, but I would suggest using less phrases on one meaning. I know that's what the song is about but it should have a beginning and an end, and it should progress naturally. To me your doesn't. Try drifting yourself into the mental state the perpective of the song is in, and explain what you feel, see, hear, whatever. Don't tell me about it, write words that will make me see and feel what you feel. And for the music just try to think up a basic theme for the mood of the song, then ride with that.