It's been some time since you posted this. I hope you are on the upward swing of things.

The thing that jumps out at me the most is try not to be labelled by your diagnosis...don't let it define you. You are not defective, you are "wired differently". Considering yourself "defective" will leach into all aspects of your life...even the things you enjoy like guitar.

If you want to apply a label to yourself, or define yourself, let it be your music, your guitar playing.

When there are physiological components to something like this, I know you can't just "get over it". However, the power of positive thinking is, well, powerful, and can help overcome the physical.

I think it's great that you are trying to get involved in a band. Linda_p is right that musicians can be a neurotic bunch ZZSmilieZZ. Armed with that knowledge, try not to get caught up in a bad situation and don't let other people bring you down. There are good people out there to work with...you just have to find them.

If you are involved with a church, you might consider getting involved with their music program. I play in our church choir and it is VERY uplifting.

You are smart to try to pursue a career rather than make music your career...so few really make it, lots of starving musicians. At the same time, don't lose your music...it can be a tool to lift you out of your dark place and help keep you out. You clearly have something to say in your music...indulge that, don't deny people of hearing that, don't deny yourself.