This time, the reason is a rather sad one....
About 12 years ago i was struggling with my guitarskills and a friend of mine introduced me to a, what he called "very good teacher". This is how i met Ingo. He tought me how to play the guitar propperly. He introduced me to a larger universe of musical diversity than i had known before. He gave me inspiration and new ideas for my musical career as he apparently did to alot of people. He had a very fine way of teaching bringing forth the individual strenghts of his students rather than demanding a certain developement. After a few years he was very proud of me, saying that i was one of his best students he had in his 30 years of teaching.
Around the year 2000 he invited me over to his studio telling me stories of his old band and all the gigs they performed and what a gread variety of excellent musicians he was fortunate to have had as bandmembers over the years. At that point he had retired from playing live on stage and focused on creating a monumental piece of music called "Green Hitler" - a twisted story about various gods (no it actually has nothing racist in it - its a metaphor). He planned the project to be a 5-CD album holding some 150 songs - and he chose me to be the guitarist of the project. With this decision he introduced me to the world of studio recording and improvising. Over the past 10 years we have been working on the project and i have learned alot in the process. I owe alot of my musical skills, views and knowledge to Ingo.
A few months ago I received a call from him after i have not heard anything from him in weeks. He apologized and explained to me that he has been brought to hospital and diagnosed with cancer. He had a small tumor in his lung and 3 metastases in his brain. He had some severe treatments and i was visiting him in hospital. 4 weeks ago he called me, telling me that hes doing better and that his response to the treatment was rather good and that we could meet soon to discuss about the project.
Well.. on monday, Jan, our singer, called me telling me that Ingo has lost his fight to cancer 5 days after his 60th birthday.
Today, the cremation ceremony took place, which of course i attended.
But that was not all - five minutes after the ceremony i was walking to my car with 2 friends. We wanted to drive to Ingos favourite restaurant where the funeral feast would take place. That was the moment when i received a call from my mother, telling me that my grandmother just died.
So i cancelled my visit to the feast, picked up Neomae and we drove to my parents place. I dont know much to tell you about my grandmother. She was 82 years old, lived through the second world war and came to austria as a sudeten german. Since i was little i always remembered her as a white haired woman sitting in a comfortable big chair infont of a TV-set. I cannot say, that - in the last 15 years or so - i have had a very close relationship to her. Not that i didnt like her or she didnt like me, but she was just like the old lady that was complaining about the people passing on the street, fearing that i was a satanist because of my black clothing and music and giving the young me underpants for christmas and birthday. She was a nice woman from what i have known of her. Nevertheless it is very strange loosing a person that you have known for so many years. Same with Ingo.
I have to admit, today was a rather demanding day. The whole week was, actually. I have not been to many funerals in my life so far. My grandfather died when i was 1 year old. The death of my grandmother is the first death of someone of my family that i conciously experience. I am left with a feeling that i can hardly put into words.
Well.. i guess life goes on nevertheless and death is a part of it. It will never cease to suprise us in even the unthinkablest moments. I think our society has failed to accept death as a part of life. I think we have very much lost contact to the "circle of life" by deliberately ignoring deaths very presence. So much the worse is the emotional impact when it reminds us of its existance every now and then.
I guess one realy must learn how to die to realy be alive.
PS: Sorry for my bad english
[FONT=Times New Roman]Holiness is in right action and courage on behalf of those who cannot defend themselves. What you decide to do every day makes you a good person... or not.[/FONT][br][br]
