Originally Posted by: chucklivesoninmyheartHit me like a ton of bricks out of nowhere today.Its genetic,not circumstantial....everything is actually ok in my life...my body just lacks certain chemical qualitys(at least thats what science has shown thus far).

Actually...no,things are not good in my life.I barley leave the house,I'm a mess physically(to my mind anyway),I have ZERO friends,no g.e.d,live month to month on SSI.I'm a LOSER to put it simply...ive been a loser my whole life.I'll be 20 in april with NOTHING accomplished...absolutley nothing.

I'm also really tempted to pick smoking back up again...I coped much better with nicotine a year ago.

Hey man, for what it's worth, you aren't a loser. You may not yet have accomplished the things in life that you might feel you need to, but you aren't worthless. No one is. You're a historically signular entity- there's never been anyone precisely like you up to this point in history, and there will never be another, so on that basis, I would never consider someone to be a loser.

I can't pretend to understand how you feel directly, since I've never experienced long-term bouts of depression, but I will say this: no matter what your circumstances in life are, if someone tries to look down on you for any reason, they are wrong to do so. No one deserves to be judged by anyone else, and if someone tells you otherwise, I for one respectfully beg to differ with them. As another human being on this planet of ours, you have basic human dignity that should always be respected, and no matter what this superficial and materialistic culture tells you, you are not a loser.

I dunno, for me, sometimes the answer lies in picking up my guitar, smoking way too many cigarettes and letting it out. No matter how it sounds, I just let it out.

For something this serious, I always encourage professional help, and that doesn't make you weak or bad or whatever, it means that you understand that there are things in life that require the help of others to get past. I just hope you feel better.

peace