What do you think of my new song


blazeofglory
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Joined: 04/03/04
Posts: 6
blazeofglory
Registered User
Joined: 04/03/04
Posts: 6
04/20/2004 2:53 pm
He everyone,

this is one of the first songs i wrote a couple of months ago.
Please let me now what you think of it!!

ps im from the netherlands so english isn't my form laguage so if anything is'n't spelled correctly please let me know

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Every night the same movie plays in my head
When I come home and see my empty bed,
keep crying while I hold the pillow were you used to rest your head
Sweet love can fade away, but memories are made to stay

Everything reminds me of you
and it seems as if you never been away.
Please tell me why does it hurt so bad,
why do I miss you every day
Keep telling myself that it’ll go away….someday

I barely sleep without you
I cant dream without you
I’m so cold without you
Please let me sleep……..

I’ve been through some changes in my life
Baby I can listen, yeah baby I can love
But you wanted to leave, Don’t worry I’ll be strong
I’ll find the strength and courage to continue my way….someday

I barely sleep without you
I cant dream without you
I’m so cold without you
Please let me sleep……..

I aint scared to lose you, yeah that’s what I said
You said you never loved me only because you’re mad
But I know that I’m different And hold on to what mamma said
Sweet love can fade away, but memories are made to stay

I barely sleep without you
I cant dream without you
I’m so cold without you
Please let me sleep……..

I always said that I’d died for you
Always said I’d fight for you
Now that I’m dying and can’t take the pain
Think that I’ll stop fighting maybe I will live another day
# 1
iamthe_eggman
Grizzled Spellchecker
Joined: 05/09/00
Posts: 2,233
iamthe_eggman
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Joined: 05/09/00
Posts: 2,233
04/20/2004 4:33 pm
Are you Jon Bon Jovi?
... and that's all I have to say about that.

[U]ALL[/U] generalizations are [U]WRONG[/U]

[/sarcasm]
# 2
blazeofglory
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blazeofglory
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04/20/2004 5:01 pm
Yeah almost :cool:

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When were going... were going down in a blaze of glory
# 3
baz123
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Joined: 04/21/04
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baz123
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Posts: 2
04/21/2004 1:06 am
that is so good.

someday would be a good title if you had it a little more in your song.

hope you have a good tune to put it to
# 4
blazeofglory
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Posts: 6
blazeofglory
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Posts: 6
04/21/2004 1:27 pm
That would be a good idea I never even thought of a title but "someday" is a good one i'l keep it it in mind thnx!

--------------------------------------------------------

When were going... were going down in a blaze of glory
# 5
metaldeath
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metaldeath
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Posts: 11
05/12/2004 1:55 pm
:D not bad! i would change the rhyming pattern though.
to something like a quatrain, you know?
metaldeath
# 6
Jolly McJollyson
Chick Magnet
Joined: 09/07/03
Posts: 5,457
Jolly McJollyson
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Joined: 09/07/03
Posts: 5,457
05/13/2004 1:18 pm
NO NO!!! Don't have a title that makes sense! That's the musician's greatest folly...try something like "Cheese on the Bridge."
I want the bomb
I want the P-funk!

My band is better than yours...
# 7
blazeofglory
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blazeofglory
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Posts: 6
05/16/2004 9:54 pm
Originally Posted by: Jolly McJollysonNO NO!!! Don't have a title that makes sense! That's the musician's greatest folly...try something like "Cheese on the Bridge."


Cheese on the bridge whahahahaha dude thats so funny i'll keep it in mind;) :D
# 8

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