Maybe what you ought to consider is buying some cheap gear or renting studio time and cutting a full-length demo or album and shop that around to find your band mates to perform the stuff live.
By using this approach, your potential drummer/bassist/whoever will know exactly what you're looking for. Plus, then you can excercise complete creative-control over the drums, bass, guitar, and everything.
Of course, for this to work, you'll have to be multi-talented and somewhat knowledgeable about every instrument. Then you can perform all of the parts on your recording.
I recently just recorded an entire instrumental album this exact way. I performed the bass, guitars, and drums. Now, if I want, I could get potential band mates to perform my tunes exactly how I recorded them.
It's a thought. It's not unrealistic either. By the way, unless you want to name the band after yourself, it's going to be very hard to excercise authority.