Then there is people like me that never excel'd in anything theory, and just the mentiononing of any theory brings flash backs to days most forgotten. Back to a period in my life when I often got the feeling of defeat, books felt like huge mountains.

I guess I am actually kind of scared to dig deep into the music theory, fearing it might actually beat me or worse even break or ground me down so hard I never find the spirit to try again. I've always been more of a hands on guy, but everyone keeps saying how important music theory is so nothing to do but to dive in deep.