Jim thought for a moment and then conceded. "Okay, is this thing on? Testing, testing ... you better play it back, make sure it's working. We don't wanna go through all this trouble and then discover, only too late, you missed your only chance."
The tape was rewound, played, checked out, and rewound again. "Ready, Jim?" "Ready." "Okey, now go." Jim thought for a moment and then began:
- "Hi, you little assholes out there listening to the radio instead of doing your homework, This is Jim Morrison of the Doors."
The Do It Now representative stopped the recorder. Jim shot a wink at Denny. "What are you doing?" he asked the rep. "I hadn't finished!" "Please Jim, We can get this whole thing done in just a minute if you'll be straightforward. Remember, this is a public service spot." Jim listened attentively and nodded. "I think I understand. Can I try it again?" The recorder was switched back on to record:
- "Hey, how you guys out there doin'? This is your old buddy Jim Morrison. I sing with a group called the Doors. You might have heard of them. We done a few songs, but I never, never did a song on speed. Drunk? Hell yeahhh ..."
The exasperated rep told Jim, "Please, you must understand what we need. Frank Zappa had fun. You can have fun, too, but you must be serious." Jim seemed to understand. "Okay, got it. Turn the sucker on. We'll get it this time. I promise."
- "Hello, this is Jim Morrison of the Doors, I just want to tell you that shooting speed ain't cool, so snort it."
The recorder was turned off and the representative sat motionless. The room was silent. "Something the matter? Was that alright?" The rep only shook his head. Jim stood up and put a hand on his shoulder. "Hey man, I'm sorry, come on, turn that back on. I'm real sorry, I'll give it to you straight this time. Honest." The rep looked at Jim. "You promise?" Jim was solemn. "I promise". The tape was set and rolling:
- "Hello, this is Jim Morrison. Don't shoot speed. Christ, you guys, smoke pot!".
The rep looked up. "I think we're getting closer, Jim, if you could just change those last few words." "I know exactly what you mean," Jim assured him. "One more time, roll it." This time Jim gave his formal introduction, warned that:
- "Shooting speed isn't that smart. Shooting speed kills geese. If you shoot a goose full of speed that goose is gonna swim in circles forever."
The Do It Now man had lost all patience and was nearly in tears. Jim was begging him. "Come on man, I'm sorry, I was just having fun, we'll get it right this time, I promise." "I don't know Jim" - the rep was shaking his head - "I can't spend all day here." "One last time," Jim insisted. "Okay, but if you don't get it right this time, that's it." "I'm sorry. This will be a take - you know what a take is?" Jim held the microphone carefully before his mouth. He paused and then began:
- "Hello, this is Jim Morrison from the Doors, and I just got one thing to say. Don't shoot speed. Speed kills. Please don't shoot speed. Try downers, yeah downers, barbs, tranqs, reds ... they're much less expensive and ... "
The Do It Now representative finally gave up.
"Dammit Jim!! I'm a guitarist not a roadie...so haul my gear"
