wut do u think about this?


armGETaTITon
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Joined: 10/28/05
Posts: 32
armGETaTITon
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Joined: 10/28/05
Posts: 32
12/31/2006 6:13 pm
i read this somewhere in LJ and it creeps me out

"The sirens killed the silence
as the city sleeps in smoke

The scene fed my contention
as the streets were decorated with corpses
and painted with blood

I slice through his insides
and All was decaying under his
posh tux and tie

My Desire created a hell out of this earth
Now my thoughts are creating one of them out of me
and I know this Last bullet will end what I'll soon regret"

i think its kinda satanic in a way.. wutcha think
# 1
Lordathestrings
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Lordathestrings
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12/31/2006 8:48 pm
Incoherent and morbid. Not even good enough to be considered macabre. :p
Lordathestrings
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# 2
earthman buck
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earthman buck
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12/31/2006 10:18 pm
Originally Posted by: LordathestringsIncoherent and morbid. Not even good enough to be considered macabre. :p

First your post in the Hendrix vs. Van Halen thread, and now this! I'm in full agreement with you 2 for 2 today!

Now if only I didn't need to spread it around.....
# 3
DAMAGED ONE
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DAMAGED ONE
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01/01/2007 6:51 pm
Get out of my head! Ha ha :D
The Mind Is A Terrible Think To Waste.
# 4
jeffhx
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jeffhx
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01/02/2007 12:38 am
hmmmmm foooooood......
[FONT=Impact]grooviest tunes ever [/FONT]
# 5
hunter60
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hunter60
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01/02/2007 12:59 am
Originally Posted by: armGETaTIToni read this somewhere in LJ and it creeps me out

"The sirens killed the silence
as the city sleeps in smoke

The scene fed my contention
as the streets were decorated with corpses
and painted with blood

I slice through his insides
and All was decaying under his
posh tux and tie

My Desire created a hell out of this earth
Now my thoughts are creating one of them out of me
and I know this Last bullet will end what I'll soon regret"

i think its kinda satanic in a way.. wutcha think



Not sure but I think it's from Hallmarks 'Hell on earth' line of Birthday cards. Not very successful but always interesting to recieve. :)
[FONT=Tahoma]"All I can do is be me ... whoever that is". Bob Dylan [/FONT]
# 6
DAMAGED ONE
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DAMAGED ONE
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01/02/2007 1:09 pm
Originally Posted by: hunter60Not sure but I think it's from Hallmarks 'Hell on earth' line of Birthday cards. Not very successful but always interesting to recieve. :)
LOOOOOVVVVE IT!
The Mind Is A Terrible Think To Waste.
# 7
iiholly
hmm
Joined: 07/29/02
Posts: 2,368
iiholly
hmm
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Posts: 2,368
01/02/2007 4:54 pm
I don't see how its Satanic.

# 8
Jolly McJollyson
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Jolly McJollyson
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Posts: 5,457
01/02/2007 5:20 pm
Satanic? I dunno about that.

Far from Satanic, in fact, I think the poem has a large Biblical element in the last line, which apparently propogates the belief in suicide as the unforgivable sin (my interpretation: what he'll end is his life, which he'll soon regret as he meets his end in eternal punishment).

Regardless, I think the poem is pretty skeletal and fragmented. I wish it were longer, as it is it feels incomplete. A longer poem would have, for me, been able to convey its images and themes much more powerfully. I also don't really like how incredibly vague it is in its leap from the outer hell created by this man or force to the inner hell of his or its soul.

The tux and tie, I assume, is the narrator's destroying the "elegant" world of the upper class or the intellectual elite, who, though they wear a pleasant, showy outer garb, rot on the inside.

There's a lot of depth to this poem, and I recognize that and feel I could, on further inspection, get a lot from it. The poem itself, however, I find mediocre.
I want the bomb
I want the P-funk!

My band is better than yours...
# 9
Jolly McJollyson
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Posts: 5,457
Jolly McJollyson
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01/02/2007 10:19 pm
Originally Posted by: AkiraYou rock my world.

Hooray! To what do I owe the honor, a critique?
I want the bomb
I want the P-funk!

My band is better than yours...
# 10

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