Originally Posted by: acapellaI see your point about rushing past the climax of the story, however I also don't want to make the story about killing. Maybe I should make that part more interesting so you feel less cheated, I'm not sure yet, but I don't want to make it the focus of the story either. So I'll have to think about that for a while.

That's a very interesting thought; a murder story that really doesn't focus on the actual murder. I like the idea. I really do. I guess I tend to be a bit more linear than you and Mr. Jolly. I can see what you are both saying. And I don't mean it to sound as if you are 'cheating' the reader. That's not it. It just seems like the murder is so nonchalant, so 'yeah, and then I killed him..." that it just makes your man something less than human. And that can work too since most who kill, even in bright moments of unregulated passion or madness, are less than human.

Or perhaps too human. That's up the writer I suppose.

I don't mean it to sound that the story should be nothing but descriptions of the killing. No. We have Andrew Vachs and Thomas Harris for things like that. No, I am one who just wants to 'feel' the wine bottle in his hand. I want to feel that sick tightening of the chest muscles as he raises it over his head and let every ounce of his revulsion rush from him to the point of impact. I want to know what that feeling of release does for him.

I like Jolly's idea in his last post. That sort of thing seems to tie it together. Something in that vein. The mix of action and thought. The 'whack ...You pompous jackass...whack...not one more night...whack...' sort of thing.

Just more thoughts. It's your story dude. Write the story you want to tell. Your readers will get it.