yeah - I don't wanna kick a dead horse... but.... :D

practice is everything. have a plan and stick to it. Here's what I do, maybe it will help you. I find a few songs that everyone can agree upon and then I burn a disk of the music and give everyone the sheet music (or tab, whatever they can use) from there, it's up to them. Maybe you're in a situation where you need to take the lead, which will be good because you can play what you want and drag the rest of 'em along screaming and kicking.

I find that if it's structured, you'll get so much more out of it rather than everyone trying to force each other into playing things that only 1 person can play... not very productive

Good luck and keep at it... it takes a while to find people you can gel with, but when you do, so it's sooo worth the effort. Lastly, keep us updated, I'd be interested to hear how things are progressing for you.