Can someone help me extend my lyrics

All i have is this. Think about the time that was yesterday we used to waste our time day after day x2

LOL, It's your story, you tell it..
What did you do to waste the time..?
Where were you when you wasted that time..?
Who were you with when you wasted that time..?
Do you have a plan it make amends for wasting that time..?

Try using a thesaurus and a dictionary for synonyms.. And as the term goes You have "poetic license", mean you can say it anyway you like..

And just for grins, web search of songs about "Yesterday"

http://www.songfacts.com/search-songs-1.php?Yesterday

Also found this about wasted time.SEARCH RESULTS FOR WASTED TIME FOUND 2 SONGS
Wasted Time - Skid Row
Wasted Time - Eagles

Now close your eyes and daydream of "the waste time in the back of your mind"..

Like compart said, it's your story. If I'm being more to the point, if you get someone to help you, then it's not your story. Which would lead me to ask, why do you want to tell this story in a song in the first place?

It's more than just creating a rhyme. It's a mental picture or a feeling...from you.

The Beatles had many great songs. Some of the quieter ones were the most artful, in my opinion. Listen to 'In My Life' or 'Yesterday'. Impactful lyrics and they transport you to a feeling.

Even if you want to just send a cool vibe, Joe Elliot from Def Leppard used to say that their lyrics were 'deep and meaningless'. I think he was getting at, that the songs sell a vibe and not an actual story.

An example I wrote (and I think posted here at one time or another). I've had a song in my head that tells about something very personal. If I tell the story literally, it has no impact. It has to represent how I feel and not the story itself. Here's an example of some of the lyrics:

There's beauty in desolation
Comfort in desperation
It's not enough to lay here and just pray
But today, you're far, far away

You may not know exactly what the story was but it should at least give you the idea that it's a loss and it hurts.

The point being, spend time understanding what it is that you want to say. Then forget about the exact words that tell the story. Explain how you feel. Write down how you feel. Maybe with your song, do some image association. Think not about the days wasting away but what were those wasted days like? Were the autumn days with cool breezes and falling leaves? Do the leaves fall down like the days from your past? You know..make it a picture that someone can relate to.

Originally Posted by: JeffS65Like compart said, it's your story. If I'm being more to the point, if you get someone to help you, then it's not your story. Which would lead me to ask, why do you want to tell this story in a song in the first place?

It's more than just creating a rhyme. It's a mental picture or a feeling...from you.

The Beatles had many great songs. Some of the quieter ones were the most artful, in my opinion. Listen to 'In My Life' or 'Yesterday'. Impactful lyrics and they transport you to a feeling.

Even if you want to just send a cool vibe, Joe Elliot from Def Leppard used to say that their lyrics were 'deep and meaningless'. I think he was getting at, that the songs sell a vibe and not an actual story.

An example I wrote (and I think posted here at one time or another). I've had a song in my head that tells about something very personal. If I tell the story literally, it has no impact. It has to represent how I feel and not the story itself. Here's an example of some of the lyrics:

There's beauty in desolation
Comfort in desperation
It's not enough to lay here and just pray
But today, you're far, far away

You may not know exactly what the story was but it should at least give you the idea that it's a loss and it hurts.

The point being, spend time understanding what it is that you want to say. Then forget about the exact words that tell the story. Explain how you feel. Write down how you feel. Maybe with your song, do some image association. Think not about the days wasting away but what were those wasted days like? Were the autumn days with cool breezes and falling leaves? Do the leaves fall down like the days from your past? You know..make it a picture that someone can relate to.

Very good lyrics Jeff. They did evoke feelings form me.. I hope our helps get mullac998 going with his song..
mullac998, don't forget to put us in your album credits..

While agreeing with the replies above, I’m also wondering what the song might become, people from different parts of the world adding parts to it.

So I will add a line and see, if others here, are as curious as me.

Sitting at the water’s edge throwing rocks in the stream, watching the clouds go by life is still a dream. Still a dream.

Next????

Hum... Guess not.

But Autumn came with dark clouds as the leaves went away.
How I miss the innocence of yesterday.


next??

as i sit all alone contemplating the day,
Dear Lord, forgive me, come what may...

Pink Floyd's "Time" is probably the best reference I can think of. In their song they talk of "picking away the moments that make up a dull day, fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way" Then like the previous poster suggested they talk about the consequence of the "And then one day you'll find, 10 years have got behind you, no one told you when to run... you missed the starting gun"

I think you need to find your message or emotion youre trying to convey. To me the best songs put you in the frame of the singer/songwriter so you can connect with how they felt when they sung/wrote their song.

A couple of tips I have been given, and use are:

Asking -

Who is saying what to whom, when, where and why...that helps me setup what the song is about, or get an idea of what I want it to be about. Of course it may change.

All rivers flow to the chorus. I try to make the verses lead into the chorus as if I was having a conversation, and the verse was the main point/theme of what I was saying. I used to jump from one idea in the verse to another idea in the chorus, so people would say huh? when I started the chorus.

Speaking the lines out loud. This does the job for the above tip, and also makes my 'emotions' real - if I wouldn't say it, I don't put it in.

Of course, I'm still learning and in an ideal world would do this stuff without thinking about it.

Good luck with your lyrics, and I hope this is helpful!

Chas

Originally Posted by: mullac998All i have is this. Think about the time that was yesterday we used to waste our time day after day x2

What chords are you playing? That's sort of important. Break this down a bit. I'm assuming you have a mixed couplet here.

C
Think about the time
G
that was yesterday
C
We used to waste our time
G
Day after day

we have an A and I rhyme. So lets make it an I and A rhyme. Toss in a minor and a hint at the chorus.

Am
I think upon those nights
G
They drift away
F C G
Time after Time

Now lets make a Transition

F
Do you remember
C
those days that we shared?
F
Do you remember
G
the past its still there


I'm thinking an F C G riff for chorus.

F C G
The years they keep passing bye
F C G
No time to wonder why x2


Just some ideas. I have no idea how the melody goes, or even the style. Just went with open chords, nice and easy. I imagine something somber. as Poe would say, Melancholy.

That said, I again emphasize how important the style and chords are. I translated it to bar chords, more a rock song. It changes, with open chords we have a hi F, bar chords give as a low f.

That said,
C, G, C, G
A, G (F C G still works) might want to double A, G
so A,G,A,G
F,C,G,F,C,G
The transition changes,
F, G, F, G
chorus as well
C,G,F (G) x4

of course we add those changes, at the very least now, we've doubled on the transition, so we need more lyrics, same with chorus. Might want to make it more salty, punk it out like greenday. Up to you.