I thought GI Joe was gay when I was a kid. I was never into military stuff, but I did like technologically advanced kick-ass robots. So of course I'm going with optimus.

I thought Superman was gay too, so I'd go with Luke. He'd find a way.

I don't remember critters all too well so I'm gonna go with gremlins. Are we assuming a 1-to-1 matchup between the gremlins and critters?