look on the channel tab at the top of the page.
A couple of instructors have single lessons to try ro explain alternatives .
I also struggle, especially with upstrokes. Anders, Caren and Gary have lessons
similar video's on youtube or try googling. Justin Guitar does a reasonable tutorial.
All seems very experimental.
Fingers, thumb, finger and thumb, ghost pick
I use a pick when practicing but still spend 5 minutes trying to find a finger strumming style that works for me.
Also noodle a bit with finger picking, google tends to include finger picking in searches for finger strumming.
It is improving. I think as beginners we tend to be a bit heavy handed and our fingers dig in.
I know my strumming improved by using the thinnest pick I could find
Sorry I couldn't be more help.
Dave