Learning guitar is going to be different for everyone and it seems like you have a common problem. A lot of the times our fingers just don't work the way we want them to, especially when we're trying to learn a new skill or song riff, etc.
My advice is to simply practice slowly, and make sure your fingers are sticking straight up off the fretboard, as much as possible, without straining your wrist.
In order to do this, you'll have to just go slow unti you build that muscle memory and those good habbits. Start slow, and then increase the speed at which you're playing these chords gradually.
Also, if you feel like you have to press down on the strings really hard, you may have your string tension too high. You can always try adjusting the strings so that the action is lower. The action is the distance between the strings and the frets. The lower the action, the less pressure you'll have to use to play something and have it come out clean. Here's a great lesson on pressing too hard from Caren, check it out: https://www.guitartricks.com/lesson.php?input=20481&s_id=1624
And of course, always reference the Guitar Fundamentals course from Lisa here: https://www.guitartricks.com/lesson.php?input=22138&s_id=1777
I hope this helps!