Hi relaxmaster,

First off, if you feel discomfort in your wrist or hand, definitely stop. It's okay to bring the guitar neck further up so that your hand is more comfortable. There aren't many rules about how to hold a guitar. The only real rule is to hold it so it doesn't bring you discomfort.

Building pinky strength and dexterity is pretty tough, and it takes awhile to really nail. I've been playing for close to 10 years and even my pinky isn't as quick and nimble as I want it to be! As you know already, practice is about all you can do to build it up. But you have to practice in a way that doesn't strain your hand and wrist too much.

Here's a pretty great set of lessons to build that pinky strength: https://www.guitartricks.com/lesson.php?input=17205&s_id=1292

Hope this helps!

-Billy