...so ever since then, I always hang on to the buckle.
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I had the same problem on electric. I used to wail on my acoustic for years (and still do), then picking up the electric required a much lighter touch. I experienced all the things you mention. I am finally getting some finesse and no doubt you will, too. It's still hard in like a "full strum mode" to hit E to e really evenly (pick ups are quite dynamic!).