I get your point Bardsley, and I don't think it's a case of being a control freak.
Take for instance a orchestra. Every ochestra player is capable of some degree of soloing, what would it sound like if everyone decided to start soloing. I wouldn't go to that show...
I just think every band needs a leader, maybe you have good leadership. You probably can figure out if a player should do rhythm or solo and "orchestrate" the band to a better sound. That's cool man, take the credit for it!