This is probably the wrong place to get a critique for this style of song... sicne I've been around long enough to know that the boards are mostly inhabited by non-conformists (which is a good thing) and metal heads (which is a very good thing). But in the last few months I've been helping my buddy with his album and we've mostly been laying down acoustic tracks... in a similar style to some of John Mayers not so mainstream stuff... like "Neon" "City Love" "Covered in Rain" etc... and this is a song I just ripped a melody for... its kind of in the style of John Mayer but more so Jason Mraz...

No Title

And the hands on the clock don't stop for you
and they don't stop for me...
Cameras can be decieving but the eyes...
They see what they see
And I see you...
And I see me...
And I see there's too much space in between...

*Chorus
But for now,
I gotta figure out somehow...
where all the pieces fit
and what it is
You want from this
I gotta find out
What you want from this
*acoustic and drum jam*

And all the pieces of the puzzle
don't pick themselves off the table
It takes somebody willing
Somebody thats able
To place them where they go
Because the pieces just don't know
*Chorus

*Breakdown/Bridge
And lately...
well you and me...
we've been spinning around this
trying to ignore what it is...
*Breakout
It's complicated!
and tell me how can I make you see it?
*acoustic jam*
*Chorus

Thats it... any feedback of the lyrics would be great. I just need some outside approval if this is too cliche or what... its suppose to be a bit cliche... because its more of an acoustic/pop song... but yeah.