heh... first job I ever had was working for a Volkswagen dealer. The owner sent me to another dealer across town to pick up a truck. I had no clue how to drive a stick shift, or even that a stickshift could be mounted on the stearing wheel hub of a truck (who ever heard of a truck with a stick shift??) , so I just threw the truck into what I thought was 'drive'.

BANG... I hit the brand new showroom car in back of me.

So thinking I'd accidentally put the truck in reverse, I tried it again and BANG smashed the car in front of me too.
Then I tried to sneak away without anybody noticing and couldn't figure out how to get the truck out of first so I drove all the way back to my job, going through red lights and burned out the clutch cause I didn't know how to stop.

I got in all sorts of crap for it. So the next day I convinced my best friend to teach me how to drive a stick shift.
We didn't have a car to practice with, so we used a banana and a dinner plate.
Next day I went back to work full of confidence & accidentally reversed a porsche into the car lift with the door open and tore the whole door off the car.
yep... that job lasted about a day and a half.