I'm going to be cliche and ask the ever lasting rhetorical question. Why? Look at this, the majority of us here have at least one lame parent and/or are illegitimate. My sister and I are both illegitimate and our father ran off every chance he could. Couldn't face being a parent so he ran. Now he lives in a completely different state and I never talk to him anymore. His side of the family and I had a falling out. Before the falling out I'd always email my dad but he'd never respond. I had to wait until he came here visiting just to find out what he had to say. So I stopped. About a year ago I was talking to my grandfather and he felt it to be necessary to critisize and discourage my decisions. He chose to tear my views to pieces and tell me what I should be doing. Accused me of various things that he can't prove to be true and probed me for things that didn't concern him. This is a man that I would defend in any situation and respect him for his knowledge and he turned that respect against me. I decided then that I would never subject myself to such a vulnerability. Never again would I allow such things to happen. About a month or two after that happened my grandmother sent me an email "apologizing" for all they had said (note: she had some words geared at me before the talk with my grandfather). I didn't respond, I just deleted it. A couple months later my dad emailed me. I figured if something remotely worth while doesn't even provoke a response from him then what else could he be emailing me for other than to take their side like he always does. So I deleted it without reading it. Just last night I received the first form of contact from any of them since then. A phone call. My mom walked up and showed me the caller ID as the phone rang. It had their name right on it. My exact words to my mom were "**** them". When I said I'd never subject myself to such situation again I meant it. I'm not going to go anywhere by constantly waiting for their meaningless approval. My feelings for them are completely apathetic now. I honestly feel nothing. The people I feel anything for can be counted on one hand now and I don't even need all fingers. And I only like them because they haven't interfered with me and I trust they won't.