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02-23-2003, 07:43 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 32
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heres somethin me and my bass player wrote about a year ago. of course, it has little to no meaning. tell me what kind of things i should work on. oh and its hard to get it if u dunno the melody and music, but wutever. im sure theres plenty to critisize.
one more chance
to fail in your eyes
one last hope
of my demise
my only thoughts
controlled by you
the love i had
was never true
lets go!
I dont need you
I'd never need you
who'd ever need you
and i'll never admit i ever ever need you
the final kiss
a lasting scar
that feeling i had
a falling star
my only regrets
are the memories
my only wish
is you again
lets go!
I dont need you
I'll never need you
who'd ever need you
and i'll never admit i ever ever need you
You don't care
I don't care
You know I care
I know you cry
yes, it sucks. but its punk music, no one listens to the lyrics
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Punk backwards is Knup...Somethings wrong...
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02-23-2003, 11:24 PM
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Gear Guru
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Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Posts: 6,201
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Quote:
Originally posted by NRLoser
...yes, it sucks. but its punk music, no one listens to the lyrics.
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Well, excuse me! I thought it was just fine until that last little bit, which is kinda confusing.
Bear with me here, I'm old enough that I confuse easily, sometimes... and whaddaya mean, "lets go!" ??
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Lordathestrings
Guitar Tricks Moderator
www.GuitarTricks.com - Home of Online Guitar Lessons
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02-24-2003, 10:27 AM
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Member
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 32
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oh, thats just an inside joke with this kid i know who plays all metal, and thinks no talent is needed for punk.
lets go is just somethin that is yelled during the prechorus. but other than that, u thought it wasnt bad?
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Punk backwards is Knup...Somethings wrong...
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02-24-2003, 11:12 AM
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Gear Guru
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Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Posts: 6,201
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Yeah, its at least as good as the stuff on the radio. As for "Lets go!", I have this literal streak in me that tends to wonder "Where?", "What for?", and such. It's kinda distracting.
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Lordathestrings
Guitar Tricks Moderator
www.GuitarTricks.com - Home of Online Guitar Lessons
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03-03-2003, 09:55 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 32
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ssf
hehe
i took out the lets go, that was dumb. thx for the feedback, u'll be enduring more soon!
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Punk backwards is Knup...Somethings wrong...
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03-24-2003, 12:08 AM
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Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Sunny Florida
Posts: 612
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Sounds pretty dark to me...
I tried to imagine a cheesy porno track behind it and it worked pretty well....
Just kidding...
Nice lyrics
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Here's a hairbnd-ism for ya...
(In my best Forrest Gump voice) Life is like a box of chocolates.... it's sweet and enjoyable, but eventually has to turn to $hit.... 
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04-03-2003, 08:27 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 554
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Work on the chorus. It sucks.
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