This reminds me of a joke I heard, which I will copy and paste (lest I screw it up):

One day at the end of class, little Johnny's teacher asked the class to go home and think of a story and then conclude with the moral of that story.

The following day the teacher asked for the first volunteer to tell their story. Little Suzy raised her hand. "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road." The teacher asked for the moral of the story. Suzy replied, "Don't keep all your eggs in one basket."

Next was little Bobby. "Well, my dad owns a farm too and every weekend we take the chicken eggs and put them in the incubator. Last weekend only 8 of the 12 eggs hatched." Teacher asked for the moral of the story. Lucy replied, "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched."

Last was little Johnny. "My Uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam war. His plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed with only a case of beer, a machine gun, and a machete. On the way down he drank the case of beer. Unfortunately, he landed right in the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but then ran out of bullets, so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more. The blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands."

Teacher looked in shock at Johnny and asked if there is possibly any moral to his story. Johnny nodded: "Don't f*** with Uncle Ted when he's been drinking!"



On a serious note, that guy is awesome.

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