Last Wonderland
02-23-2003, 08:48 AM
Alright I'm new here so I don't know how you people work on this board if your flamers or winners, and perhaps my spelling is ****ty & over rated but hey, I had poor schooling so try to over look it. ;)
By the way I made it easy for you if you just want to read how my first gig went then it should be way down on the post.
But any who I'll tell you how my first gig went in a sec or 2, or whatever... but let me tell you "how" I got to my first gig, it's much more intersting! Yeah thats it, about 3 years ago when I was 17, I found a Gipson guitar in a dumpster in the back of Denny's. (Usally spot where all the teens go in the area to smoke pot, get drunk, and maybe not to often have a good lay.
The gippy was pretty ****ty looking but all the strings were there. The fret was broken in half and the body of it was cracked in half also. But I said "hey, what the hell" not to often do you find this crap in a dumpster! So I went with my penis & took it home with me.
After a couple weeks went by & having it keep dust in the corner of my bedroom. I was board & finilly got off my ass to fix the broken ****er. So I fixed it up, spray painted it white & put the letters in design "ScareCrow" on the front of it, put some duck tap around the broken neck to make it stay & also around the big crack it had, took it outside to air it out ect...
About 6 weeks later I was screwing around out back looking for things to do when I stumbled on it. At this point the neck was half way off because the duck tap must have broken off from the rain & the only thing holding it was the rusty strings. So I brought it in, put some more duck tap on & scraped the rust off the strings.
My Ant (also the bitch that doesn't want to teach me crap, even though I have been asking her to teach me for 3 years now) used to be into guitars like 30 years ago & has been playing guitar for about 24 years until she quit & sold most of her guitar **** a couple years ago.
Any who, she had an old amp down in the basement so I brought it up with a cord to plug it in with. As soon as I plugged it into the Amp I found out the main reason who ever own this hunk a junk besides the fact that the neck was ****ed, was because no sound came out of it.
So I'm like saying out loud "YOU SON OF A ****! & put another crack into the used whore by smashing it against the wall putting a hole in the wall also, (but I'm not worried, it's not like there isn't holes in my bedroom already!) It's not like I was pissed about the gippy, because I already knew it was broken but the fact that I had to carry that heavy amp up 2 flight of stairs all by my self really got my ball sack cracking!
So I said to my self "Screw this, after making an "effort" in my part to fix it, I sure the hell an't going to walk away from it!..." After an afternoon of fixing "The Gippy" with some crappy tools I found in the basement. I got "The Gippy" to atleast sound like some thing even though it was loud and winey.
(To tell you the turth the sound I got off from it really sounded basar!) Me not know anything about guitars, not knowing how to tone them.(& still really don't) To cheap to even buy new strings or any of that. I just started messing with it (& been doing that almost every day for about 3 years now!!!)
Passing Forward To About 7 Months Later:
I'm really getting good at playing the man whore, I no longer sound like a beginner just plucking the ****er. But I also don't know a damn string, chord, how to tune it, or even basic guitar slang, but I'm not worried... Hey, as long as what your playing sounds good it's all smooth slick. Any who at this point I'm trying to come up with my own stlye. Thats when it hits me.
I'm smoking a blunt with thee cozoz when Nirvana In Bloom comes up on thee rat-te-o. I'm like holy **** how the **** is he playing like that well turning the radio full blass. (I have heard of/to his music before but never really paid any listen to it, Hell maybe it was the pot that I was on at the time that got me a listenin, only GOD knows)
Thats when I desided that I want to get into gaunge. Lets just face it, with almost every other kind of music out there, you feel like you have to try, but with gaunge & it's sounding like horse **** but at the same time good, either way you don't have to give a ****, also can go sloppy on stage well playing it.
Gaunge gives me this free feeling high like LSD or being drunk, ;) where I can loosen up my fingers, not give a care & just go with it in a daze. Come to think of it, it's kind like being in total nirvana man. Any who a couple days later I find 2 boxes in the trash by Zip-Co. An old 50-60's Tube Screamer TS10 Classic, an a mid70's Super American Metal DOD FX56-B.
The Screamer works find well the DOD kind of has a problem, you have to stand in one place making sure you don't move the cord thats hooked up to it or it will just go off, other then that every thing was kool & also a great find. I bum the 9v bat's from friends when I need new ones, screw paying for them I mean battaries are hell of alot of cash.
Now Fast Forward To About 3 Months Ago:
I finally get the balls to reply to one of them poster ads at one of the local area's music centers (You know where all the rich kids post band openings, thinking there kool because there mommy and bitch daddy paid for there lessens)
So I phone the number on the ad & this guy picks up we start talking & I agee to go over to his house to meet him & the band. I go over there the following afternoon, I step into the house & meet the members, (By the way there dressed up like regaler main stream punk bands that you watch on MTV. You know the ones with the buzz cut air with the little dyed spike in the front, T-shirt, Long baggy pants with a chain for there wallet, & skater shoes)
"Well I" come walking in with cut up geans with only ties holding them up, 50's basketball shoes that I bought when I was like 14 years old they are also duck tapped so the snow doesn't go into the holes that are on them, food stain shirt with farmer like jacket, & 3 weeks unwasted hair that I slicked back with my own self producted grez.
There like "Uga....So....What can you play,,,,!???" I said to them I'll play All Apologies by nirvana. ( I didn't want them to know I only knew how to play like 3 full songs and about 5 half-ass songs)
So I use my DOD with my ScareCrow & start playing & singin along just for the hell of it, never really thought about being a singer in a band but once I saw there eyes light up, at that point I'm like "dang I guess I am good". After finishing up there like "Yo how did you do that at that part & that part etc...!?" & all that crap.
I show them a couple lead bits I did & all. They ask me to play another song but I just reply telling them I'll just do some lead bits. I start to jam like a fog horn until my ScareCrow dies out on me. (by the way thats what I'm calling old gippy now)
It's not like I'm shocked that ScareCrow gave out on me, it does that like every 10 mins when I'm on it. I just give it a couple good kicks/stompings or throw it at some thing to get it working again.
Once I did that they said "Um.....hold on we will be right back we have to talk things over..." they go into the other room and I hear them start laughing from over the walls.
They come back and say "Um....we're looking some one that has the same taste in music as us." I'm like "Thats kool". Once I got my DOD packed and ScareCrow, just when I'm about to step out one guys yells out "Why don't you take a shower ya creep!" They all laugh...
Fast Forward 2 Weeks Later:
I'm sitting at home eatting chips, watching King Of The Hill & feeling pretty bummed out. My cousin comes running in telling me that he found a guy thats going to give us his old drum set that he doesn't use any more. I'm like "No ****, really? Kool!" We drive over to the guys place I never really get the meet the guy but the drum set was out on his lawn with a note telling us that he went to the store and you can take it.
(My cousins like all happy & ****, so he no longer has to go over to peoples places be nice to them just so he can jam on there drums. But to tell you the turth the drums looked like a pieace of ****!) It's green & trashy looking with alot of holes in it, also missing a couple parts! But I guess nothing trusty old duck tap can't fix!!!
It came with no drum sticks so we just broke off 2 broom handles that we found lay in around in the trash in the same area well we were driving home. Duck tapped the broken part of the brooms so my cousin doesn't cut him self well playing.
Takes us about an hour to get everything set up & then we were ready to smoke the room & make our neighbor's ears bleed!
Now On To The Part Where How My First Gig Went:
So my cousin Joey & me has been practicing together for the pass 2 1/2 months & were getting good an of (In my mind to go on stage) to start thinking about getting a gig around town. So about a week ago we go to the "The Pussy Twist" some where out side of jersey.
We ask the owner if we can play here? (By the way the owner is some big fat biker dude) The guy said sure there is a slot open this friday, you both will be paid 20 bucks for an hour or so show & if you need band equipment you can use ours. I"m like saying "kool!".
I didn't think it was going to be so easy!? So this hole week we were try in to come up with a band name. (by the way can you guys on this board help us out, I can't deside if we should be called "Lost WonderLand, Last WonderLand, Violet Violents, Or Just plain WonderLand?") We couldn't deside on the name so we just called our selfs that night "The Unknowners".
So before we got to the club that night I just keep drinking so I can get way wasted so I don't have to remember that night & freeze up on stage. (Broute my smugglers along just for a refill) When we got backstage I looked out & there was like 200 people waiting, I'm saying to my self "Oh god help me!" well taking another hit of the bottle.
(these people all look nasty and trashy looking I think there like me where they wear that every day not just for the night!) But I liked it! So The guy calls out "They say there from long island & Haven't thought up a name yet but please welcome The Unknowners!"
I'm backstage saying I don't know if I want to do this but then just tell my self "**** it". Get on stage well hearing the crowd scream/yell. I'm drunk an a little messed up but I yell out "Do you guys want to hear Lithium!?" they all start screamming and ****.
(We didn't have a bass player for the song so I ask if anyone from the crowd knows or atleast can pretend to play bass please step up) Around 5 poeople stepped up, I picked one to play & said to the others that there pretty brave comparded to the rest of the crowd so they can stay up on stage and do whatever the ****ing want.
I start playing my own wording of Lithium, after I was done The crowd went wild & the guys on stage made it even better because threw out the hole song they were jumping around like a bunch of crazied monkies. I couldn't belieave how good that song sounded with the owners PA & diffrent kind of boxes he suppied for us.
(Then it hits me I only know about 2 other songs & it's been only 7 mins & I still had like 45 mins left on stage Not only that but my ScareCrow is going to die out in another 3 mins, probably have to wait another 15 mins to get it started again.! (From 3 months ago just kicking it would work fine to get it started but now old ScareCrow needs like a recharge or some thing to get it started it again, normally have to wait 15 mins to play again)
To pass the time I started singing Little help from my friend & John Lennon's Power To The People with joey just doing drums & that other guy just screwing around with bass. The crowed started getting into it to. Even tho there like 4 min songs I pro-longed to about 17 mins. How, I don't really remember, I was drunk!
(This is when I thought it be a good time to get to know how these new boxes working & to try out some new stuff on them) Once I got old ScareCrow aworkin again I just did lead bits and made up new ones well joey was banging on stage. I really didn't know what the guy on bass was doing & really didn't care about him nor the crowd because for 10 mins I was so into the music & ScareCrow I just didn't give a damn.
After ScareCrow went dead again I started talking about how my life sucks & how the Goverment liberals screwing me over! ( After 9/11 happen most people are Conservative in New York City & New Jersey) After having the crowd yell out "Screw The Liberals!" for like 3 mins (& maybe hopping for a roit to happen) After old ScareCrow got back online I did the Doors cover of Strange days with my own Anarchy sound in the back ground.
At this point the owner was getting pissed but he really didn't get into a murderest rage until I "evidently" puked on his PA system, half way threw the song. Him & his bouncers grab me and my cousin off stage. Meanwhile most of the crowd starts yelling No & Booo, well there throwing us out.
He said if you want to get your band equipment come back tomrrow morning & that he never wants to see our faces around here again. We cam back yesterday morning to get our stuff we found it in the dumpster behind the place. Right now we're plaining to play out in 2 weeks after we learn 2 more songs or so.
By the way we got our 40 bucks for playing there. We promised our self we put the money back into the band by buying equipment and stuff but we mostly spent it on beer, cigs, chips, & gas money. But the crowd seem to love us so it wasn't all that bad. Thats the main reasons we're doing it again & also because it was hell fun!
profit we have earn: 40$
profit we lost for equipment & stuff for the band: 0$
Getting kicked out of a gaungy night club for puking on the owners PA: Priceless
By the way I made it easy for you if you just want to read how my first gig went then it should be way down on the post.
But any who I'll tell you how my first gig went in a sec or 2, or whatever... but let me tell you "how" I got to my first gig, it's much more intersting! Yeah thats it, about 3 years ago when I was 17, I found a Gipson guitar in a dumpster in the back of Denny's. (Usally spot where all the teens go in the area to smoke pot, get drunk, and maybe not to often have a good lay.
The gippy was pretty ****ty looking but all the strings were there. The fret was broken in half and the body of it was cracked in half also. But I said "hey, what the hell" not to often do you find this crap in a dumpster! So I went with my penis & took it home with me.
After a couple weeks went by & having it keep dust in the corner of my bedroom. I was board & finilly got off my ass to fix the broken ****er. So I fixed it up, spray painted it white & put the letters in design "ScareCrow" on the front of it, put some duck tap around the broken neck to make it stay & also around the big crack it had, took it outside to air it out ect...
About 6 weeks later I was screwing around out back looking for things to do when I stumbled on it. At this point the neck was half way off because the duck tap must have broken off from the rain & the only thing holding it was the rusty strings. So I brought it in, put some more duck tap on & scraped the rust off the strings.
My Ant (also the bitch that doesn't want to teach me crap, even though I have been asking her to teach me for 3 years now) used to be into guitars like 30 years ago & has been playing guitar for about 24 years until she quit & sold most of her guitar **** a couple years ago.
Any who, she had an old amp down in the basement so I brought it up with a cord to plug it in with. As soon as I plugged it into the Amp I found out the main reason who ever own this hunk a junk besides the fact that the neck was ****ed, was because no sound came out of it.
So I'm like saying out loud "YOU SON OF A ****! & put another crack into the used whore by smashing it against the wall putting a hole in the wall also, (but I'm not worried, it's not like there isn't holes in my bedroom already!) It's not like I was pissed about the gippy, because I already knew it was broken but the fact that I had to carry that heavy amp up 2 flight of stairs all by my self really got my ball sack cracking!
So I said to my self "Screw this, after making an "effort" in my part to fix it, I sure the hell an't going to walk away from it!..." After an afternoon of fixing "The Gippy" with some crappy tools I found in the basement. I got "The Gippy" to atleast sound like some thing even though it was loud and winey.
(To tell you the turth the sound I got off from it really sounded basar!) Me not know anything about guitars, not knowing how to tone them.(& still really don't) To cheap to even buy new strings or any of that. I just started messing with it (& been doing that almost every day for about 3 years now!!!)
Passing Forward To About 7 Months Later:
I'm really getting good at playing the man whore, I no longer sound like a beginner just plucking the ****er. But I also don't know a damn string, chord, how to tune it, or even basic guitar slang, but I'm not worried... Hey, as long as what your playing sounds good it's all smooth slick. Any who at this point I'm trying to come up with my own stlye. Thats when it hits me.
I'm smoking a blunt with thee cozoz when Nirvana In Bloom comes up on thee rat-te-o. I'm like holy **** how the **** is he playing like that well turning the radio full blass. (I have heard of/to his music before but never really paid any listen to it, Hell maybe it was the pot that I was on at the time that got me a listenin, only GOD knows)
Thats when I desided that I want to get into gaunge. Lets just face it, with almost every other kind of music out there, you feel like you have to try, but with gaunge & it's sounding like horse **** but at the same time good, either way you don't have to give a ****, also can go sloppy on stage well playing it.
Gaunge gives me this free feeling high like LSD or being drunk, ;) where I can loosen up my fingers, not give a care & just go with it in a daze. Come to think of it, it's kind like being in total nirvana man. Any who a couple days later I find 2 boxes in the trash by Zip-Co. An old 50-60's Tube Screamer TS10 Classic, an a mid70's Super American Metal DOD FX56-B.
The Screamer works find well the DOD kind of has a problem, you have to stand in one place making sure you don't move the cord thats hooked up to it or it will just go off, other then that every thing was kool & also a great find. I bum the 9v bat's from friends when I need new ones, screw paying for them I mean battaries are hell of alot of cash.
Now Fast Forward To About 3 Months Ago:
I finally get the balls to reply to one of them poster ads at one of the local area's music centers (You know where all the rich kids post band openings, thinking there kool because there mommy and bitch daddy paid for there lessens)
So I phone the number on the ad & this guy picks up we start talking & I agee to go over to his house to meet him & the band. I go over there the following afternoon, I step into the house & meet the members, (By the way there dressed up like regaler main stream punk bands that you watch on MTV. You know the ones with the buzz cut air with the little dyed spike in the front, T-shirt, Long baggy pants with a chain for there wallet, & skater shoes)
"Well I" come walking in with cut up geans with only ties holding them up, 50's basketball shoes that I bought when I was like 14 years old they are also duck tapped so the snow doesn't go into the holes that are on them, food stain shirt with farmer like jacket, & 3 weeks unwasted hair that I slicked back with my own self producted grez.
There like "Uga....So....What can you play,,,,!???" I said to them I'll play All Apologies by nirvana. ( I didn't want them to know I only knew how to play like 3 full songs and about 5 half-ass songs)
So I use my DOD with my ScareCrow & start playing & singin along just for the hell of it, never really thought about being a singer in a band but once I saw there eyes light up, at that point I'm like "dang I guess I am good". After finishing up there like "Yo how did you do that at that part & that part etc...!?" & all that crap.
I show them a couple lead bits I did & all. They ask me to play another song but I just reply telling them I'll just do some lead bits. I start to jam like a fog horn until my ScareCrow dies out on me. (by the way thats what I'm calling old gippy now)
It's not like I'm shocked that ScareCrow gave out on me, it does that like every 10 mins when I'm on it. I just give it a couple good kicks/stompings or throw it at some thing to get it working again.
Once I did that they said "Um.....hold on we will be right back we have to talk things over..." they go into the other room and I hear them start laughing from over the walls.
They come back and say "Um....we're looking some one that has the same taste in music as us." I'm like "Thats kool". Once I got my DOD packed and ScareCrow, just when I'm about to step out one guys yells out "Why don't you take a shower ya creep!" They all laugh...
Fast Forward 2 Weeks Later:
I'm sitting at home eatting chips, watching King Of The Hill & feeling pretty bummed out. My cousin comes running in telling me that he found a guy thats going to give us his old drum set that he doesn't use any more. I'm like "No ****, really? Kool!" We drive over to the guys place I never really get the meet the guy but the drum set was out on his lawn with a note telling us that he went to the store and you can take it.
(My cousins like all happy & ****, so he no longer has to go over to peoples places be nice to them just so he can jam on there drums. But to tell you the turth the drums looked like a pieace of ****!) It's green & trashy looking with alot of holes in it, also missing a couple parts! But I guess nothing trusty old duck tap can't fix!!!
It came with no drum sticks so we just broke off 2 broom handles that we found lay in around in the trash in the same area well we were driving home. Duck tapped the broken part of the brooms so my cousin doesn't cut him self well playing.
Takes us about an hour to get everything set up & then we were ready to smoke the room & make our neighbor's ears bleed!
Now On To The Part Where How My First Gig Went:
So my cousin Joey & me has been practicing together for the pass 2 1/2 months & were getting good an of (In my mind to go on stage) to start thinking about getting a gig around town. So about a week ago we go to the "The Pussy Twist" some where out side of jersey.
We ask the owner if we can play here? (By the way the owner is some big fat biker dude) The guy said sure there is a slot open this friday, you both will be paid 20 bucks for an hour or so show & if you need band equipment you can use ours. I"m like saying "kool!".
I didn't think it was going to be so easy!? So this hole week we were try in to come up with a band name. (by the way can you guys on this board help us out, I can't deside if we should be called "Lost WonderLand, Last WonderLand, Violet Violents, Or Just plain WonderLand?") We couldn't deside on the name so we just called our selfs that night "The Unknowners".
So before we got to the club that night I just keep drinking so I can get way wasted so I don't have to remember that night & freeze up on stage. (Broute my smugglers along just for a refill) When we got backstage I looked out & there was like 200 people waiting, I'm saying to my self "Oh god help me!" well taking another hit of the bottle.
(these people all look nasty and trashy looking I think there like me where they wear that every day not just for the night!) But I liked it! So The guy calls out "They say there from long island & Haven't thought up a name yet but please welcome The Unknowners!"
I'm backstage saying I don't know if I want to do this but then just tell my self "**** it". Get on stage well hearing the crowd scream/yell. I'm drunk an a little messed up but I yell out "Do you guys want to hear Lithium!?" they all start screamming and ****.
(We didn't have a bass player for the song so I ask if anyone from the crowd knows or atleast can pretend to play bass please step up) Around 5 poeople stepped up, I picked one to play & said to the others that there pretty brave comparded to the rest of the crowd so they can stay up on stage and do whatever the ****ing want.
I start playing my own wording of Lithium, after I was done The crowd went wild & the guys on stage made it even better because threw out the hole song they were jumping around like a bunch of crazied monkies. I couldn't belieave how good that song sounded with the owners PA & diffrent kind of boxes he suppied for us.
(Then it hits me I only know about 2 other songs & it's been only 7 mins & I still had like 45 mins left on stage Not only that but my ScareCrow is going to die out in another 3 mins, probably have to wait another 15 mins to get it started again.! (From 3 months ago just kicking it would work fine to get it started but now old ScareCrow needs like a recharge or some thing to get it started it again, normally have to wait 15 mins to play again)
To pass the time I started singing Little help from my friend & John Lennon's Power To The People with joey just doing drums & that other guy just screwing around with bass. The crowed started getting into it to. Even tho there like 4 min songs I pro-longed to about 17 mins. How, I don't really remember, I was drunk!
(This is when I thought it be a good time to get to know how these new boxes working & to try out some new stuff on them) Once I got old ScareCrow aworkin again I just did lead bits and made up new ones well joey was banging on stage. I really didn't know what the guy on bass was doing & really didn't care about him nor the crowd because for 10 mins I was so into the music & ScareCrow I just didn't give a damn.
After ScareCrow went dead again I started talking about how my life sucks & how the Goverment liberals screwing me over! ( After 9/11 happen most people are Conservative in New York City & New Jersey) After having the crowd yell out "Screw The Liberals!" for like 3 mins (& maybe hopping for a roit to happen) After old ScareCrow got back online I did the Doors cover of Strange days with my own Anarchy sound in the back ground.
At this point the owner was getting pissed but he really didn't get into a murderest rage until I "evidently" puked on his PA system, half way threw the song. Him & his bouncers grab me and my cousin off stage. Meanwhile most of the crowd starts yelling No & Booo, well there throwing us out.
He said if you want to get your band equipment come back tomrrow morning & that he never wants to see our faces around here again. We cam back yesterday morning to get our stuff we found it in the dumpster behind the place. Right now we're plaining to play out in 2 weeks after we learn 2 more songs or so.
By the way we got our 40 bucks for playing there. We promised our self we put the money back into the band by buying equipment and stuff but we mostly spent it on beer, cigs, chips, & gas money. But the crowd seem to love us so it wasn't all that bad. Thats the main reasons we're doing it again & also because it was hell fun!
profit we have earn: 40$
profit we lost for equipment & stuff for the band: 0$
Getting kicked out of a gaungy night club for puking on the owners PA: Priceless