Say it aint so (A broken heart, A broken Life)

[oib111]

This is the second song htat I haveosted here. And I think this one is pretty good. And I know the "-o-oh"s sound funny. But they sound really good in rl. Please, give feedback.

Verse

To know its all on track
And you're never going back
And all you want to do is scream
Yea, that's what it means to me

Verse

Always set to blame
And always change your name
But always ashamed

Chorus

Say it ain't so
Please let me go
Back where I was
And never gone
Say it ain't so
Don't let me go
I can't survive
Don't let me die

Say it ain't so
Please let me go
Back where I was
And never gone
Say it ain't so
Don't let me go
I can't survive
Don't let me die

Verse

Sit with my regrets
And reconsider my self-respect
All I do is contemplate life
And try not to take out the knife

Verse

My pain is never ending
And messages keep on sending
Back and forth to me
And light is something I don't see

Chorus

Say it ain't so
Please let me go
Back where I was
And never gone
Say it ain't so
Don't let me go
I can't survive
Don't let me die

Say it ain't so
Please let me go
Back where I was
And never gone
Say it ain't so
Don't let me go
I can't survive
Don't let me die

Bridge

A broken heart
A broken hope
A broken soul
A broken life

Chorus

Say it ain't so-o-oh
Please let me go-o-oh
Back where I was
And never gone...before
Say it ain't so-o-oh
Don't let me go-o-oh
I can't survive
I will not die

Say it ain't so-o-oh
Please let me go-o-oh
Back where I was
And never gone...before
Say it ain't so-o-oh
Don't let me go-o-oh
I can't survive
I will not die

Say it ain't so-o-oh
Please let me go-o-oh
Back where I was
And never gone...before
Say it ain't so-o-oh
Don't let me go-o-oh
I can't survive
I will not die

Say it ain't so-o-oh
Please let me go-o-oh
Back where I was
And never gone...before
Say it ain't so-o-oh
Don't let me go-o-oh
I can't survive
I will not die

Outro thingy :p

Say it ain't so
This is my hope...

[Drew77]

Well its fairly long, which is good. It is a lot of repeating but thats fine also. I liked it. The structure is really solid I liked your rhyming and were you decided not to.

I agree with you its a great song assuming the music rocks. If you record it you should post it.

[oib111]

Hehe I would record it but I suck at multi tracking and I would do one track recording but I'm no good at punch ins either (if I mess up). And I would just have guitar. And it wouldn't sound as good cuz I would have to be constantly switching settings seeing as I only have two pedals. Is there anyway I can get like a drum track in there? I can create my own bass track from my keyboard. But can I get drum tracks?

[Drew77]

Well I guess it depends on what program you are using to record it with. But generally yeah you can get drums in as either loops or if there is a midi drum instrument then you can get drums the same way as the bass but you'll probably want to write it by hand rather than try to tap the keys along with the music.

[oib111]

What I really need are tutorials for recording(anybody got any). I mean like I know certain things but not like officially record so it sounds smooth and stuff. Now that I think about it my bands recorder, he just records us all into different tracks. I always tried to give sections to my instruments, like guitar has a track for verse, and chorus. But I should have just done it all in one track. Cuz now that I think about it, we just play until we get it perfect, and that's our track...Man I've been going about recording all wrong. Well still, anybody got some tuts?

[looneytunes]

I like some of the lyrics and rhyming, but it goes nowhere. Sure you are feeling bad and can't surive, but it's just repeated over and over again. Get away from the pain and focus on who, how, why, and where you came and where you are going.

The song is too long for playing time, but good for stage. You may want to consider two versions. I think you should also look at song structure. Your music will play a big role in this.

I hope this helps. Just remember, it's only my opinion. I think if you focus, you could write a good song.

Good Day!

[Drew77]

I do agree with Looney on the focus thing. I mean really this song is fine if like I said it has good music to go with it. But in the future if you focus more on actually telling a story or communicating a full idea then your songs will just be more meaningful.

As far as the length like I said I like long songs, but looney is saying that it is too long for radio playtime which it probably is, but honestly thats not something I give a rats ass about. I haven't heard any decent new music on the radio in ages.

In my opinion music shouldn't be a commodity that is designed to sell and who's creation is based around some formula or template that statistics say sells better than whatever else.

That said if you want to write songs that will get played on the radio then thats great I don't look down on that or anything and a lot of people just write shorter songs so they don't have to worry about it. You could probably fit this song in under four to four and a half minutes if you don't pack it full of instrumental parts.

But whatever, the point is don't worry about whether a song is "too long" or anything really until you write it. If it drags and becomes uninteresting then thats when you know it's too long, not if it exceeds four minutes. You do have a lot of repeating like I said so that is something that I would assume gets adjusted as you write and play the song.

If you want to add anything to this song I would add a conclusion of some sort. Either positive or negative who knows it's your song, or you may just want it to end un-concluded and thats fine.

As far as tutorials go I'm not sure there have to be a few. Anything I have found has really helped very little, the best thing I can recommend is to find someone who knows how to record and watch them do it, same with mixing and stuff too. It's one of those things that really just has basic rules and then you sorta just make it up as you go and try to find the sound you want.

[oib111]

Actually, if you hear it, it's prolly an average song. You know normal 3 minutes song. Just seems long. And the only reason I don't make it go anywhere is nothing has happened yet, so if nothing happened I would basically be making up a story that I may want, but essentially hasn't happened, and I don't want that. I just wait.