depressed

[jeffhx]

hey guys...i have this huge thing for this girl whom i've know for ages.... never really affected me but during this trip, i realised that she's all i'm after...it's sad and depressing... have thought abt confessing but seriously...i'm pretty much convinced that she wud not feel the same...just agut feeling though...im leaving soon back to melbourne and it'll kill me...geez...this is kinda cheesy but heck... i reckon my case is less... 'decorated' than a typical love story... she stayed over for a couple of days and it was great... :(... help... hugging her while sleeping was awesome... she has a boyfriend whom she isn't really happy with... sigh...she's the type where it takes more than just cuddling each other to bed as a sign of attraction...sigh i really don't know wat to do... i wrote a poem abt her...tell me what u guys think...



what was that for?
why did you convulate things more?
why are you so fascinating?
what was it for?

self denial
it is impossible
it is simply trivial
but i'd show you why i'm capable

things are different now
time came knocking on the door
what was that for?
the barrier makes me need more

show me something
you're simply amazing
but i need more...
what was it for...

take me somewhere nice...
take me somewhere right
rose petals bloom
i do not dare to assume

for you are remarkable...
what are you thinking?
how are you feeling?
HE? is debatable..

incompetent..
insignificant...
are you just pious?
no...you're just oblivious...

it's not love...
it's not lust...
it's reality...
this is different..

what is this for?
soon i'd be gone
soon i'd be alone
so please give me more...

what would you do?
soon you'd be gone...
i might be wrong
i'd better sing this song..

what was that for?
please don't convulate things more
please be ridiculous
all hopes uncalled for...

[acapella]

I really don't know what to tell you, buddy. That's a real tough spot you're in, all I can say is good luck. As the poem says, this is reality. Who knows what could happen?

[Cryptic Excretions]

hey guys...i have this huge thing for this girl whom i've know for ages.... never really affected me but during this trip, i realised that she's all i'm after...it's sad and depressing... have thought abt confessing but seriously...i'm pretty much convinced that she wud not feel the same...just agut feeling though...im leaving soon back to melbourne and it'll kill me...geez...this is kinda cheesy but heck... i reckon my case is less... 'decorated' than a typical love story... she stayed over for a couple of days and it was great... :(... help... hugging her while sleeping was awesome... she has a boyfriend whom she isn't really happy with... sigh...she's the type where it takes more than just cuddling each other to bed as a sign of attraction...sigh i really don't know wat to do... i wrote a poem abt her...tell me what u guys think...

All I can say is what's the worst that can happen? She says no thanks? I understand the degree of humiliation involved in exposing yourself like that, but the humiliation is all in your head. As far as opinions go, anything outside of your own shouldn't hinder your own goals and progress. If she shares the same opinion, then great. Anyway, the point I'm getting at is the prime goal is to express yourself. And it's not gonna be expressed to the satisfactory degree until you confront her. Now, I'm not gonna go and give you tips on how to approach her, or tell you what to do, or this, or that, or whatever. Recite the poem if you like, or greet her with a head butt to the jaw and a punch to the gut, I don't care. Just so long as it happens is all that really matters. If nothing comes from it then years from now you'll probably be lucky enough to remember it, but if something does happen, then the doors of opportunity will be flung wide open. If you want it bad enough, then something's gonna have to give.

Here, think of it like this. You're 17 years old and you're trying to buy some cigarettes. You walk into the local gas station and look at the grizzly, over-weight, middle-aged man with a bald spot, a mario brothers style moustache, and pit stains. He asks what he can get you in his natural, destroyed from smoking for 30+ years voice and you say, "a pack of smokes," trying to sound natural, and of age. At this point one of two things can happen. Either he'll card you or he'll give you your cigarettes. If he gives them to you then you can smoke yourself to cancerville faster than I get off after going a week without touching myself. If he asks for your card then, being the minor that you are, you say something dumb like, "I forgot it," and just leave, never to see him again. And the journey to find another gas station that won't card you ensues.

Go for it dude, why not?

[jeffhx]

the thing im afraid of that it might spoil our friendship.. she's really amazing...mature, capable of looking out for herself...what if things get much worst when i confess? that wud kill me more...i reckon the best thing to do is to confess just before i leave...lol... i know im a coward...always have been inthis kinda thing...i've always wanted somebody like her...but i was never able to find someone like that...at least not at my age...or maybe i'd need to get out more...sigh...i hopeshe's coming over again tomorrow...alcohol wud make it easier for me to confess i guess... sigh..dillemma.....

[Cryptic Excretions]

the thing im afraid of that it might spoil our friendship.. she's really amazing...mature, capable of looking out for herself...what if things get much worst when i confess? that wud kill me more...i reckon the best thing to do is to confess just before i leave...lol... i know im a coward...always have been inthis kinda thing...i've always wanted somebody like her...but i was never able to find someone like that...at least not at my age...or maybe i'd need to get out more...sigh...i hopeshe's coming over again tomorrow...alcohol wud make it easier for me to confess i guess... sigh..dillemma.....
If she's as good of a friend as you speak of, then would she not deserve to know how you felt?

[jeffhx]

If she's as good of a friend as you speak of, then would she not deserve to know how you felt?

yes she's a great friend..but before this i have never felt anything like this towards her before...but i guess time passed...and we all changed and grew up...now i look at her differently...sigh..i wish i didn't have to leave...im just really afraid that confessing wud spoil our friendship altogether...and that's worst...sigh...im really sad....**** like this always happen...and i always keep it in me...no guts to tell her how i feel...

[acapella]

If you already cuddle her in bed, do you really think it would ruin your friendship to tell her that you "like" her? Besides, from the sounds of it you don't want a friendship anyway, all it would do is keep causing you pain. I say better to know for sure, one way or another.

[jeffhx]

that's true.. but honestly i reckon she'll say no anyway...besides...imnot that kinda guy that is rich, tall, good looking...then again im not saying shes that kinda chick...but ya know...i really dunthink she'd accept...after all...im just a sad pathetic guitarist that sucks with no luck in this kinda stuff...being with her, id just have to be myself...im so freakin comfortable....geez...howi wish this feeling never occured...then again, im a sucker for chicks like this...and they dun come by easily...she's just so different...

[Jolly McJollyson]

hey guys...i have this huge thing for this girl whom i've know for ages.... never really affected me but during this trip, i realised that she's all i'm after...it's sad and depressing... have thought abt confessing but seriously...i'm pretty much convinced that she wud not feel the same...just agut feeling though...im leaving soon back to melbourne and it'll kill me...geez...this is kinda cheesy but heck... i reckon my case is less... 'decorated' than a typical love story... she stayed over for a couple of days and it was great... :(... help... hugging her while sleeping was awesome... she has a boyfriend whom she isn't really happy with... sigh...she's the type where it takes more than just cuddling each other to bed as a sign of attraction...sigh i really don't know wat to do... i wrote a poem abt her...tell me what u guys think...



what was that for?
why did you convulate things more?
why are you so fascinating?
what was it for?

self denial
it is impossible
it is simply trivial
but i'd show you why i'm capable

things are different now
time came knocking on the door
what was that for?
the barrier makes me need more

show me something
you're simply amazing
but i need more...
what was it for...

take me somewhere nice...
take me somewhere right
rose petals bloom
i do not dare to assume

for you are remarkable...
what are you thinking?
how are you feeling?
HE? is debatable..

incompetent..
insignificant...
are you just pious?
no...you're just oblivious...

it's not love...
it's not lust...
it's reality...
this is different..

what is this for?
soon i'd be gone
soon i'd be alone
so please give me more...

what would you do?
soon you'd be gone...
i might be wrong
i'd better sing this song..

what was that for?
please don't convulate things more
please be ridiculous
all hopes uncalled for...
What the hell does "convulate" mean?

PS, just ask her out. Even if she says no, thinking that would "ruin a friendship" is very naive.

[jeffhx]

in this context, to make things more complicated

[Jolly McJollyson]

in this context, to make things more complicated
I meant that it's not an actual word.

[jeffhx]

a word of expression

[Jolly McJollyson]

a word of expression
Well, for Lewis Carrol it's one thing, but I don't think you're making this an entire poem of fake words... I mean, it's like having a random chromatic note that sounds completely out of place in the song. Just put in a real word there, there are plenty of them.

[jeffhx]

it's weird i know buti did come across it some time ago...if iremember, i bumped into it in psychology class...

[tehplatypus]

why not use just exacerbate? not nearly enough poetry has exacerbate in it.


/watched shaun of the dead lately

[Jolly McJollyson]

it's weird i know buti did come across it some time ago...if iremember, i bumped into it in psychology class...
Complicate, Convolute? Exacerbate?

[Akira]

Just tell her how you feel; if she's as good a friend as you say she is, she'll accept your feelings, whether she feels the same way or not. I'd get it out the way with ASAP; you don't wanna do it on the day before you move just to find out she feels the same way.

As the saying goes:

If you've got nothing, then you've got nothing to lose.

[jeffhx]

i guess you're right...i'll find the right time to tell her...man this is gonna be hard...it's crap really...even if she does feel the same...but we're so far apart...geez...i really think it's not easy to find someone like her...this might sound cheesy...but really...you'd have to know her to understand...geez i sound really cliche...and i hate it lol... but it cant be helped can it?

[Akira]

i guess you're right...i'll find the right time to tell her...man this is gonna be hard...it's crap really...even if she does feel the same...but we're so far apart...geez...i really think it's not easy to find someone like her...this might sound cheesy...but really...you'd have to know her to understand...geez i sound really cliche...and i hate it lol... but it cant be helped can it?

Don't worry about it, I wish you all the best.

[bigbuda]

Do I understand this right? You are saying you guys have slept in the same bed together, cuddling. But yet you won't tell her how you feel. If the chick is sleeping in your bed, chances are she's got the same feelings. C'mon Now.

[iiholly]

I've slept in a bed with two guys and had no feelings for them, but they were my two best friends at the time. I don't know, I don't go around cuddling with guys even when I didn't have a boyfriend. She's probably being flirtatious. I wouldn't tell her. I'd try to see if she did first my talking manipulatively. Thats how I roll. But really don't worry too much. It is just a girl.

[Akira]

I've slept in a bed with 4 guys and 4 girls, seriously. No feelings involved though.

Truth has it we were all drunk and we could only find one matress in the immediate vacinity. :rolleyes:

[Cryptic Excretions]

One time I slept in a bed completely by myself. I was all alone and I just happened to be in a bed.

[ericthecableguy]

Jeff, I know exactly how you feel man...I understand that if you say something things could get really weird between you two...But you've got to tell somebody you can trust, or it will just eat you up inside.

[earthman buck]

One time I slept in a bed completely by myself. I was all alone and I just happened to be in a bed.

You only think you were alone.

[iiholly]

I've slept in a bed with 4 guys and 4 girls, seriously. No feelings involved though.

Truth has it we were all drunk and we could only find one matress in the immediate vacinity. :rolleyes:

That doesn't count. Because then I'm a bed whore. And not in the way it sounds.

[magicninja]

Before I got married anytime there was a girl who was going to sleep in the same bed and a couple of times in the same room I made a pass at them. I was only let down once out of two dozen times. I was actually pretty shocked to be honest. That's probably an around here thing. We have an over abundance of girls who are willing. I don't think this is what you're after you seem to actually like this one. I'm no macho pig. I was just seventeen and out of my head. To be honest I don't know many guys if any who could just "cuddle" a girl all night and not feel the need. You had to have at least thought about it. That's how I was when I was your age anyway.

[jeffhx]

i forgot to tell u guys...she stayed over my place for a couple of days because she was moving out..and her place did not have water...now that the water's back and she's settled in, she's not staying no more but she did come around to visit with another friend...it gets lonely and boring at night now ya know guys...i feel so sad and pathetic...and i dont wannna spoil what we have now...

[iiholly]

I wish my boyfriend never moved in with me sometimes. Especially when I want a cigarette or beer.

[6strngs_2hmbkrs]

what can I say, bite the bullet! look, I've had more girl trouble in my life then I care to mention. and I'm only 16.. all I can say is, you just gotta tell her. could it ruin the friendship? probably not, but possibly.. but hey, though it seems like there could be no better girl out there, I can guarentee that there are, and that you'll find another (probably sooner then you'd think) after my last girl broke up with me, I thought there'd never be anyone else (see the longest thread in GT history for further details.. if you care to read that much.. it would probably take like 12 hous to read the whole thing) and what can I say? I have a date this weekend. in fact.. I actually had to think really long and hard about which girl I wanted to ask out for valentines day.. I think I could list about 5 different girls, that either I liked, or that liked me, or both.. so who says there aren't better girls out there? there are.. plenty of them.. trust me.

so, in conclusion, you just gotta tell her. whatever happens, happens, that's the way the cookie crumbles.. think of it this way, best case scenario, she says she likes you back, you fall in love, and go have rough passionate sex with each other forevermore... worst case scenario, she says she doesn't like you back, and now feels uncomfortable around you, and she never wants to talk to you again, you sit around your house feeling depressed, not eating or sleeping much, for several weeks, then you get better, get over it, and move on without the burden on your shoulders anymore.. and the "not the best, but not the worst" case scenario, she says she doesn't like you back romantically, but she does still like you as a friend, and wants to still be friends, and you can move past your romantic feelings for her, just appreciate her as a friend, and move on without the burden over your shoulders.

but, the really really absolute worst case scenario is: you don't tell her at all, she is totally oblivious, and you carry out your life letting these feelings eat you from the inside out until the depression worsens and worsens until it drives you to do something stupid like commit suicide.. and then she'll be going through your stuff after you're dead, come across journals, notebooks, songs and poems written about her, she'll realize what drove you to suicide, and then she'll wish you had just told her instead of bottling it up inside you.

[Jolly McJollyson]

but, the really really absolute worst case scenario is: you don't tell her at all, she is totally oblivious, and you carry out your life letting these feelings eat you from the inside out until the depression worsens and worsens until it drives you to do something stupid like commit suicide.. and then she'll be going through your stuff after you're dead, come across journals, notebooks, songs and poems written about her, she'll realize what drove you to suicide, and then she'll wish you had just told her instead of bottling it up inside you.
Why would she be going through his stuff after he died?

[earthman buck]

Maybe she's stalking him. That'd be a pretty cool twist in this saga.

[6strngs_2hmbkrs]

it's more likely that his parents would be going through his stuff.. but I dunno, I just thought that would make my little scenario better if it was her that was going through his stuff after he died..

[Leedogg]

Grind up some Zoloft and do some hog-leg rails the size of your pinky. That's what happens when ol' Leedogg gets the blues.

[jeffhx]

this chick is really hard to get...and it excites me...a challenge is always awesome...cos it's too unpredictable....at the same time it makes me feel like crap...furthermore, she's the kind i have been trying to look for... my fiirst girl was something like her...but that was a long time ago...still...nothing compared to the one im so into right now...geez...i have a feeling that the kind of girl i like will not find me their type...

[bigbuda]

this chick is really hard to get...and it excites me...a challenge is always awesome...cos it's too unpredictable....at the same time it makes me feel like crap...furthermore, she's the kind i have been trying to look for... my fiirst girl was something like her...but that was a long time ago...still...nothing compared to the one im so into right now...geez...i have a feeling that the kind of girl i like will not find me their type...

Which is exactly why you have to tell her how you feel otherwise you will never know! Go.....NOW! Tell her!!!!!! ;)

[earthman buck]

Me and my friends spent an entire class today reading a similar post on a drum forum. It was hilarious, because it was just like this one, only more exaggeratedly so, almost to the point of being cartoony. Same responses too. Funny how that works.

I will never be able to respond to posts like these without hurting the poster's feelings, so....good luck, jeffhx, but there's really nothing anyone can do for you. It's all up to you, man.

[jeffhx]

lol to be honest i never thought id post abt an issue like this...i guess i had to tell somebody...itstoo dangerous totell the ppl im arnd with...that night when i started the thread i was a tad bit drunk and inspired... thus the crappy poem...lol...i got all emo...thanks guys...will see how things goes

[6strngs_2hmbkrs]

what's her phone number? are you going to make me call her and tell her for you? like little jr. high kids? seriously dude, the longer you wait, the harder it gets. you just gotta suck it up and do it! not at the last second before you leave.. because.. what if she did like you back? then you two find out you're made for each other.. then you gotta leave like 2 seconds later.. it would be pointless. tell her asap. the next time you see her. even if that means calling her tomorrow to go to lunch with you, then tell her there. (I recommend telling her in person, and not over the phone, and definately not in e-mail) just go for it dude.