Stage Fright and Confidence

[Lori_B]

I am curious how many of you experience problems with playing infront of people. So far I have not yet seen a thread dealing with this issue (unless I've missed it)... I have terrible problems with playing infront of people and it doesn't seem to matter how well I know what I am playing. I can know something backwards, forewards and standing on my head and feel very confident but then when it comes time for "performance"... I turn into a "deer in the headlights", weak in the knees and hands sweating so badly that I have actually slipped right off my strings (I won't mention the time I threw up afterwards)... I have asked the other people I play with if they have trouble and they all claim they do but you certainly wouldn't know it. They also say it will get better with time... Well, I've been playing as many as a couple times a week for about 5 months in front of people with no improvement. Now I realize this isn't a real long time but I woulda thought I woulda felt at least some relief by now... It's getting to the point where I actually tell myself I am NOT going to do this no more, I QUIT! But right back I go... I love to play and I can't revert back to playing in the closet again. Any suggestions out there?????

[Jolly McJollyson]

You know, I have the same painful nervousness whenever I play in front of anyone at all. However, I also have MCd a lot of local events and during shows I usually do some stand-up between songs (you think playing MUSIC is unnerving!), and thatis KILLER on your nerves. However, when I get nervous and start shaking, I realize that I'm shaking because of my adrenaline rush that comes from being nervous. I just use that boost in energy to bring more life to my performance. Albeit, it is a painful experience for a little while, if you use your nervousness to your advantage and fuel your performance with it, you'll find it helps quite a bit.

Also, you could always take a shot or two of Jack Daniels before you go onstage, not enough to get drunk, obviously, but enough to calm down.

[Blizzard_UK]

I can relate to this a little, I always got very nervous before going on stage, the only cure I found was a good drink but then I played like crap, so I guess I needed to find the balance. The big problem is if you drive yourself to the gig because you then had to drive back UI, a bit stupid really.

I doubt that I have helped you but I just thought I would let you know that you are not alone.

I haven't gigged properly for years now although the last gig I did was at my local pub back in 2002, it's just across the road so that went well until the second half when I lost my place doing the lead in Parisian Walkways, damn it, that Stella really creeps up on ya.

Go get some hypnosis, that'll sort you out. I'm not joking.

[kingdavid]

I find stage fright to be a good thing, because to me it means you give a ____ about the quality of your performance and the opinions of your audience. It means you want to do well, otherwise why would you worry.
However, when it gets to the point you throw up afterwards, that scares me.

[SPL]

I used to get nervous just playing in front of friends... after doing it over and over again, it felt as comfortable as playing by myself.

I used to get nervous while recording myself... after doing it over and over again, it felt as comfortable as just playing without the pressure of having to get it right...

Now, getting on stage in front of people you don't know is a whole other deal...
The trick for me is to focus on having fun. Even if you don't get everything exactly right. Ask yourself, how many people are actually going to notice, and how many of those are actually going to care?

Now, I do get nervous going on stage, but not to the point where it affects my performance.

[Dr_simon]

Yep I found the more you do it the easier it gets !

It is certainly less harrowing than giving a scientific presentation !

[Lava_Monster]

I am pretty sure I was born a nervous person. I was born shy and I had a lot of problems getting in front of people( now I can do it with ease). I think what helped me out is that I started to focused sololy on what I had to do. For example, I would put all my engery into the notes I was about to play and everything needed to play it right. I would zone out the audience and just focus on my hands and guitar and the music. Nothing else. Of course that gives a bad show for the audience, but after a while I got the confedence knowing I could play a good live set and I eventually let loose and went wild. The first time it was really weird, but after hearing how great I did, I realized it was worth feeling stupid. I hope it helps

-Ralph

[Lordathestrings]

Yep I found the more you do it the easier it gets !

It is certainly less harrowing than giving a scientific presentation !You've obviously never played a bar that had chicken wire between the stage and the room. Chicken wire with holes in it from the ocasional bottle that gets through!. :eek:

[chucklivesoninmyheart]

You wern't in the movie 'roadhouse' Lord were you?

[Lordathestrings]

No, I grew up in Kingston, Ontario. Some of the rural bars around there in the late sixties and early seventies were a tad bit rustic don'cha know? :rolleyes:

[paradyme]

Right on! The use of rustic in the last post was awesome!

I have a gig comedy story I can add to this one- It helped me to learn just to find a zen place in my mind and have fun but be in a chill state. But here's how it started, and talk about losing yourself in the moment... myself and 3 other guys were doing some gigs randomly as a 4 piece, covering old 60's AM and garage rock standards: i.e., Gloria, Sometimes Good Guys Don't Wear White, Only Everything, Hey Joe, blah blah...

so it was around the holidays and we were all nervous and antsy and stuff (our singer was ((and is)) the most high strung person you'd ever meet-the boy could make a bottle of xanax have a panic attack)... anyway, so we're getting ready to go on after this blaring punk rock band (they were kinda punk-by-numbers- they were from CT, so my brother started calling the singer JOhnny Groton. heh- we're dorks...anyway)

So just before we go on, we see like 5 people dressed like santa claus rolling into the bar, then a few more and so on... once we started our set, we had like 100 or so people dressed like santa who were drunk as hell and rowdy as anything I've ever seen, except this 1 guy who was dressed like Abe Lincoln. I don't have a word to describe how surreal a slam-pit of drunk santas and punk rockers is while your band plays Gloria for like the 3rd encore at an unpublicized bar gig. I have taken stage performance with a grain of salt since that time- it's all in good fun, but the word for that night was "befuddled."

thanks for reading

peace

[Homebrew1709]

Two words: DRINK BEER

[Lordathestrings]

... the word for that night was "befuddled."..."The smoker you drink, the player you get!" :D

[paradyme]

Two words: DRINK BEER

how can I argue with logic like that... it just makes sense!

I can't play too well if I'm drinking... other sources of inspiration come to mind, but this might not be the place for that... :cool:

[paradyme]

"The smoker you drink, the player you get!" :D


No occifer, I swear to drunk I'm not God!

:D

[Lori_B]

So just before we go on, we see like 5 people dressed like santa claus rolling into the bar, then a few more and so on... once we started our set, we had like 100 or so people dressed like santa who were drunk as hell and rowdy as anything I've ever seen, except this 1 guy who was dressed like Abe Lincoln. I don't have a word to describe how surreal a slam-pit of drunk santas and punk rockers is while your band plays Gloria for like the 3rd encore at an unpublicized bar gig. I have taken stage performance with a grain of salt since that time- it's all in good fun, but the word for that night was "befuddled."

:D too funny... So perhaps there is something to the ole saying "imagine eveyone in their underwear"... only new and improved now with "drunken santas and dudes with spiked pink hair"

[ranma187]

yeah a few drinks is fine before stage. but don't go overboard. i've jammed with people and the more they drink.. the worse they sound but the better they think they are playing.

the first stage performance for guitar i had.. was a solo at my grad show party. basically i had to play a guitar piece in front of 300 ppl my first show. and i had to do it 2 nights in a row... well the first night i bombed it. but the second night it was easier and very much better. my advice is ignore the audience if they are being negative, just completely focus on what your doing. however if your audience likes your music. that will give you positive energy to work from and you'll do great.

[kingdavid]

...It is certainly less harrowing than giving a scientific presentation !
Tee hee!!
I guess it would be as harrowing if one had to play guitar in front of Pat Metheny, Bill Leavitt, all those Malmsteen and SRV and Van Halen dudes, and Les Paul thrown in for good measure.
That would be harrowing!! :eek:

[Akira]

I myself have never played for a big audience. The biggest audience i've played for is like 6 people. I get nervous just thinking about playing live, however, I get really excited too at the prospect. Tis a strange thing indeed. :rolleyes:

[ake]

It's natural to be nervous when performing. And a couple beers really do help.
But what I do is give myself a good talking to. I say even if I miss some notes, or chord changes, even if I blow it real bad; whats the worst that can happen? The audience isnt going to take you our into the parking lot and pound you. Chances are they didn't notice your mistakes anyway. If you're playing in a bar I can garentee they didnt notice. If your band mates point out your dinks; be sure to point out theirs. There are a lot of things in life to be worried about. But take it from an old pro {60} Rock and Roll aint one of em. Rock on!!! Peace and Love

Another thing to remember is that music isn't a sport thus no competition.
Music is an art and its open to YOUR interpertation. The only thing that is truly important is how YOU feel about what YOU play. Dont be to self critical.
Like Zappa said: shut up and play your guitar.

Guitars save lives!

[Lordathestrings]

It's worth remembering that most people will "give that song 9 outa 10 coz it got a good beat n it ez 2 danz 2".

Sad, perhaps, but true.

[Pantallica1]

Playing in front of people, is like learning to play the guitar.

The more you do it, the better you get.

[chucklivesoninmyheart]

A shot/beer or two will really calm the nerves.Even with anxiety and panic disorder I have never been uncomfortable in front of people with my guitar...cause I know what i'm doing for the most part.

I'm invulnerable to criticism,names and or any form of mental attack while behind the guitar.Its my shield and my sword.

[mike_a_f]

I used to get really nervous before I played shows because I was always worried that I would screw up. And I have screwed up many-a-times (sometimes worse than others) But you just have to accept the fact that it's going to happen. These days I still get nervous but not as bad as I used to. Something that helped me was not to look at the crowd, just focus on your hands. Eventually you just get less nervous and it just becomes part of the thrill of performing...and this just takes longer to happen for some people. So I think you just need to keep doing it.

This is the way I see it:

Whenever people see someone else that is nervous on stage they can tell. They know that it's hard to play when your nervous and know that person is probably much better players off stage than on. People aren't going to think your a bad player because you made a few mistakes on stage. Plus half the time they don't even notice. Also, there's always next time to show them different if they do notice.

Even the best players have bad shows.

[riconaka]

Lori,

I think one of the toughest thing to do is go up on stage in front of an audience and play. Like all the people say, practice makes confidence. Play in front of small groups, and ramp it up. I started out playing folk stuff in front of my friend I wrote songs with, and I was really nervous in front of him. Then, the more I did it, I got used to it. Now, it's been 14 years now. I play at my church that has a audience of 400+ for 2 services, and I sure the heck can't drink beer to loosen me up either. :p But I have absolutely no problems. If I mess up, well, I have my band to cover me up. But then again, when you're playing lead guitar, you can't hide well... :rolleyes:

One thing that helped me is to play the song that you're going to sing over and over until you feel comfortable not looking at your fingers, and you can close your eyes singing. Heck if you can head bob, or head bang, that's even better. The more animated you get, usually means that you're getting comfortable with your playing, and that's one less thing to worry about when you're up there. If you mess up, make a good one. We ALL have those stories. :D

[Polera]

Learn diapharmatic breathing. Breath from the lower abdimon and pratice that instead of upper thoracic. Its a natual calming technique.

[rockonn91]

um really if u just forget about wat ur doing and just have fun then thers nothing to worry bout....

most of all dont think about screwing up.
cuz that makes u screw up.

[Akira]

Time for a good ol' cliche: What's the worst that could happen?

[HDJ]

I usually take a Xanax about 30 minutes before hitting the stage. I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder though. Before I had the Xanax, I would get so nervous I'd shake and screw up my parts, and that's after 12 years of gigging, in front of some large crowds, a few shows with 800+ people there. So I can't say it get's better in time, but I have a reason I can't say that....

[fastelvis]

You'll get over it sooner than you think. I had the same problem but since getting past it, I would not trade my time on stage in front of a big crowd for anything. It is by far the best natural high.

Sounds like you haven't convinced yourself you are GOOD!
Playing and singing is a gift many, many people do not have. However, it's for sure many, many people appreciate music and that's why they are there; to see someone do what they cannot and to hear the magic.

Before you perform, close your eyes and become part of the audience, imagine sitting there with them, watching yourself on stage and hearing the fantastic music you create. Then open your eyes, smile really big and show them you are having a great time with them.
It's the time of your life!

[TOXIC SHOCK TROOPER]

Lori, I commend you on having the courage to just play in front of an audience! I've played 9 years and the most people I have played in front of was a group of about 10 people. And that was just me, no backing musicians.

Thats one reason why I've never done a live show, I've never really been in a band! But the truth is, I'm shy, nervous, etc... just like many people here have said they were/are also.

I drink a lot as it is, and alcohol does calm the nerves, but after about 5 beers it messes up my playing too which I sure dont need! So I would like to think that when/if I get my shot on stage, I'll do it sober. Its definately an experience that I would regret never doing should I die tomorrow. I like the suggestions people here have made too, ya'll rock!!

[chucklivesoninmyheart]

Just realize YOUR in control and you know what your doing.